Life success coach, healer and author Tony J Selimi is a firm believer that communication is the key to our survival, life and living in peace with oneself and others – and we’re with him! Here he shares seven quick refresher tips for acquiring good communication skills. Experiment with these ideas to begin to experience communication and life more powerfully:
1 Learn to listen
Communication is a two-way street – do more listening and less talking. Observe the changes in the other person as you spend more time listening. Stop, listen, and be prepared for feedback and clues of comprehension
2 Understand what you and others value
Recognising how to communicate through other people’s values will help you go far in life. It opens many doors that lead to many paths, as you’re perceived as engaging, caring and loving
3 Know what you want to say, how you will say it and why
Clearly understand the purpose and intent of your message. Ask yourself what outcome you want to achieve and the impression you want to leave. We all know it’s not always what you say but how you say it that counts. Convey your message in a cooperative and non-adversarial tone
4 Reach an understanding or agreement
You must understand and be understood. Make sure your message has been received as intended and any questions or concerns have been alleviated
5 Clarity of thought
Be clear about what you want to express. Often we spend more time speaking about superficial matters rather than addressing core, significant and underlying concepts. Inner clarity and a thorough communication with yourself is vital
6 Tact and good manners matter
That said, don’t let good manners inhibit you from speaking your truth! If your communication isn’t honest, integrity is lost and relationships suffer. Tact matters as much as honesty!
Communication isn’t only the words a person verbalises – it’s also the silence between the words. We learn about each other by what we don’t say as much as by what we do say. We learn about each other by listening to which topics we discuss as well as the ones we avoid.